Okay, now that I have a little perspective... and I'm exhausted, here's the poop on the wedding I went to recently. As described in IM conversations with friends, names changed to protect the not-so innocent:
BLAMEME: exhausting! and I got so ill!
INNOCENT: I've been wanting to ask how the bachelor party went!
INNOCENT: Oh NO!!!
BLAMEME: but I survived. :)
INNOCENT: Stomach flu ill or Cold ill?
BLAMEME: have I mentioned that I have multiple chemical sensitivies?
BLAMEME: I'm violently allergic to perfume, paint, cig smoke, roses, etc.
BLAMEME: as in I stop breathing around it (worst reaction), develop migraines, GI upset, joint pains, etc.
BLAMEME: so I expected to have encounters with stuff that would set me off.
INNOCENT: holy crap
BLAMEME: there is some mitigating I can do, and I did what I can.
INNOCENT: oh my, at a wedding....
INNOCENT: I bet all of those things were everywhere!
BLAMEME: the bachelor party went very well. We went to the Ale House which has 36 beers on tap and tried to drink them all. :)
BLAMEME: no one was wearing perfume, and in NY, all smoking has to be done outside.
BLAMEME: since I was driving, I had an excuse not to get completely drunk, which was good for my system. :)
BLAMEME: But Friday and Saturday involving hanging out in PA, where smoking is allowed in bars and in restaurants.
BLAMEME: And the wedding party did a lot of that.
INNOCENT: oh yipes
BLAMEME: Friday we met at the bride's home, where everyone put out their cigarettes as soon as I arrived.
BLAMEME: which keeps the problem from worsening but is still plenty of ambient!
BLAMEME: it was grey in that kitchen.
BLAMEME: So while waiting for everyone else to get there, folks headed off to a bar in walking distance. I enjoyed the walk and the air was marginally cleaner in the bar.
BLAMEME: We went to the church for rehearsal. No smoking in church (hallelujah!).
BLAMEME: Then to a restaurant for dinner. The restaurant was definitely walking through a smoking section to get to the back.
INNOCENT: oh man
BLAMEME: Then I made the mistake of going to pee.
BLAMEME: The toilet is apparently where the help smokes.
BLAMEME: By the time my pants were around my ankls, I was seeing things.
INNOCENT: oh crap!
BLAMEME: No, just pee. so I managed to get out of there, hacking up a lung, and run outside to the fresh air of car exhaust. Everything in PA seems to be on a highway.
INNOCENT: Oh my!!
BLAMEME: I made the groom drive us home, because I was still seeing things and coughing heavily.
BLAMEME: I slept in as much as I could which helped reset the system a bit.
BLAMEME: my bedroom is as close to non-alergenic as I can get, and it's my refuge.
BLAMEME: Sleep is a very good thing~
INNOCENT: well how miserable that must have been!! I can't even imagine!
INNOCENT: Well, I sort of can...
BLAMEME: But we had the wedding to go to. We had to leave here at 11 so we could all meet at another bar before the wedding at 2.
INNOCENT: Cigarette smoke made me throw up when I was pregnanty... lol
BLAMEME: Then while the bride was careful about giving me silk flowers, she had real roses in all of the other bouquets- including the one on my husband.
BLAMEME: roughly 7 dozen roses in all.
BLAMEME: And I was the only woman in the back, so I pinned flowers on all of the men.
(I could insert a story or 7 dozen about the pastor here)
BLAMEME: Naturally, by the time the ceremony started, I was reacting to the roses. Coughing loudly throughout the ceremony.
BLAMEME: Ceremony ended about 2:30. Reception didn't start until 5:30. Guess where we spent the interval?
BLAMEME: that's right, a bar.
INNOCENT: HOLY CRAP!!!!
BLAMEME: The bride tried very hard to be helpful and asked that no perfume be worn at the reception.
BLAMEME: Did anyone obey the request? Well, I could not tell.
INNOCENT: You were too busy avoiding all the smoke in all the bars??? LOL
BLAMEME: I got lots of whiffs from odd people, as well as a layer of air freshener in the restaurant, and of course, it's a restaurant where smoking was permitted.
BLAMEME: They tried to make smoking only happen in one section- the open bar.
BLAMEME: For the most part, people obeyed that. Except of course the one woman sitting in front of me with the smoke blowing on my face during dinner.
BLAMEME: so I could not even eat.
BLAMEME: I was at the Head Table. it's extremely rude to leave it.
BLAMEME: My husband and I left shortly after the First Dance.
BLAMEME: We both spent yesterday just lying around trying to recover.
BLAMEME: But then, he's the designated drinker, so you can imagine his is more hangover than anything else.
BLAMEME: The bride was lovely, the groom quite handsome, and her family very scary.
BLAMEME: but overall it went well.
BLAMEME:comforting my German friend... he and his wife were furious about the "dirty socks in the living room right after the reception" - apparently the father-in-law as soon as he gets home strips off shoes and socks and will not ever pick them up.
BLAMEME: that's small potatoes, I think.
BLAMEME: I'm still happy I didn't see any wife-beaters, torn jeans, or bowling shirts.
BLAMEME: they obviously made an Effort
INNOCENT: oh geez! lol
LAMEME: They's very classy. no apliances on the front porch, no hunting dogs under the porch, no rusting car hidden by grass anywhere in that yard.
BLAMEME2: Why you can't doing any hunting from the bathroom winder neither- too many dang houses about there.
BLAMEME: And, at no time during the festivities did anyone mention a gun rack or offer to take anyone target shooting in the yard
BLAMEME: SADGROOM: if it wouldn't be for the dirty socks in the living room after the wedding ...
BLAMEME: which beat the hell out of used crack pipes, smashed beer bottles, and buckets full of caught drips.
BLAMEME: Hell, they got indoor plumbing and electric lights!
BLAMEME: and he did confirm my feelings that made me so happy we snuck out early from the reception.
BLAMEME: The DJ brought a Karoake machine. The father-in-law can't stand for long periods, so they felt he wasn't up to a dance. So the bride sang to him, a tender ballad.
BLAMEME: Called "Daddy's Hands". She did a lovely job and her father cried through it.
BLAMEME: except it reminds the groom of incest.
BLAMEME: "Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin´.
Daddy´s hands, were hard as steel when I´d done wrong.
Daddy´s hands, weren´t always gentle
But I´ve come to understand.
There was always love in Daddy´s hands."
BLAMEME: and of course, later in the evening, someone didn't guard the mike well... and Gosh. There was karoake for Everyone! how painful.
BLAMEME: Because most of the guests had been helping themselves to the open bar all night. (plus all the meetings in the other bars)
LAMEME: It's a wonder anyone could stand up to sing.
BLAMEME: But for all I know, they just took up chairs.
BLAMEME: Yeah, it was certainly quite the social occasion.
INNOCENT: It sounds like fun was had by all
INNOCENT: (Except you with your allergic reactions!!) :-O
BLAMEME: I had fun when I could.