story x (a scene never appearing in any movie, but maybe it should)

I’LL NEVER BE YOUR MAGGIE MAY

ESTABLISHING SHOT: A candlelit restaurant, table for two.

FRANK
Well, Maggie, it’s been a year and a day since we first met. Today’s the deadline at last. Are you ready to give me your answer now? (he puts a small brown box on the table)

MAGGIE
I still can’t believe you proposed to me at our first meeting. Almost the first words out of your mouth.

FRANK
Yet you gave the perfect answer-

MAGGIE AND FRANK SAY TOGETHER:
Give me a year and a day, and I’ll think about it. (both laugh)

FRANK
I can’t believe you took me seriously.

MAGGIE
But as you see, I have.

FRANK
I used to propose to women all the time as a pick-up line.

MAGGIE
You won’t do that again.

FRANK
No. I promise.

MAGGIE
You never would have ended up in handcuffs that night otherwise.

FRANK
I didn’t know you were carrying them! That was a lot of fun… but kinky.

MAGGIE
That’s not kinky. Kinky is using the whole chicken.

FRANK
I am a changed man, thanks to you. I became your devoted slave that night. I love you more than I could ever love another person ever.

MAGGIE
More than yourself?

FRANK
I’m being serious.

MAGGIE
So am I. (beat). Darling, I love you too. But I’m ready with my answer now.

FRANK
But?! What but?

MAGGIE
I can’t marry you.

FRANK
WHAT?

MAGGIE
You are too traditional for my tastes. In the depths of your cold, dark heart, you still expect me to give up on my career so we can have babies and I will take care of the house just so. You want your Perfect Woman – a angel in public, a demon in the bedroom, and the Perfect Mother to your kid. Give it up. I’m not that woman. No one is that woman. I resent your continual pressure to become that woman. This is probably coming out from left field for you because I don’t think you’ve heard a thing I’ve ever said on the subject. But I think this is the perfect day to say this firmly and clearly so you will understand. Darling, I love you. Bye.  ¶ 12:03 AM