It’s the fact that it’s the same bob-damn songs over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and…

And then you have the variations of the same songs, because every new singer has to produce the same damn songs only make them Unique. So the caterwauling is slightly different and you can no longer sing along.

And then inevitably someone greets you with a smile and is so bob damn happy for the season, and you just want to eviscerate them a rusty spork. The commercials yell BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY and if you aren’t a good person, you won’t buy X item for your loved ones. You don’t love them if you don’t buy them this thing. And the guilt of if you really loved your family you’d go see them and buy them this shit and let’s sing another carol to drive the point home and don’t you have plans for the holidays? and haven’t you just fucking consumed enough?

This is why I just want to consume alcohol, turn off all the lights, unplug the phone and crawl under a pile of blankets and not come out until it’s warmer.

FUCK the holidays. There is nothing Holy about them these days. They’re all fucking cursed and can die in a fire already.